Curiosity Killed the Cat
by Puddle-Jumper38
Summary: A Remnants tag. Rodney is dying to know what Sheppard saw and there can't be any harm in asking, right? Rated T because of the torture in Remnants. Spoilers for Remnants.


**Curiosity Killed the Cat**

**Description:** A Remnants tag, because I got attacked by a plot bunny and there can never be enough episode tags. Rodney is dying to know what Sheppard saw and there can't be any harm in asking, right? Rated T because of the torture in Remnants. Spoilers for Remnants (obviously…).

**Spoilers:** Major spoilers for Remnants (as you'd expect), but also spoilers for Phantoms. There's also a reference to the Shrine and to Common Ground. Let's just say anything up to Remnants is fair game.

**Disclaimer:** The characters, ideas and just generally Stargate do not belong to me. I wish they did though…..

* * *

Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard walked through the corridors of Atlantis next to Dr Rodney McKay, who was uncharacteristically quiet. Since he had a good idea of why, John hoped that Rodney would be able to contain his curiosity, at least until after John had left. After which Rodney could speculate all he liked with the now very real Radek Zelenka.

Unfortunately John wasn't sure exactly where he was going, so had yet to think of an excuse to leave. When his team had left the mess hall, he'd simply followed Rodney automatically. He knew he should probably be making a start on the mission report from his trip to the mainland, but John wasn't sure how to start writing _that_ little adventure. Or what to include. It was unlikely Woolsey would let him get away with a Ronon type report; 'we came, the botanist found a variety of plants, we left'.

"What did you see?" Rodney blurted suddenly. Then he assumed a defiant expression that John assumed was to cover to any guilt he felt in directly asking.

John feigned a puzzled expression. "When?"

"Oh, come on," Rodney snapped. "I saw Zelenka, Woolsey saw some very hot woman, which I have to say was very unfair considering I got Zelenka…. that's not the point. I mean obviously it felt it had to distract you, for whatever reason. So how did it do it?"

"Effectively," replied John tightly. The phantom pain in his left wrist had started up again and he flexed his hand to remind himself it was, in fact, still there. _You never lost it John. Remember?_ None of it had been real. Maybe if it he kept reminding himself he'd actually start to believe it. Kolya was dead. He'd been dead two years and he was staying that way.

"Oh, I get it, you're embarrassed. What was it? A group of insanely beautiful women leading you off?"

John didn't reply. He could feel the punches slamming into his face, the ropes cutting into him and he could see that bastard raising the machete….

"Wait, don't tell it was a bunch of beautiful women who refused you, because that would really explain your reluctance to tell me."

All the tension John had been feeling suddenly focused on the single point of Rodney's ridiculous questions and before he knew it he was swinging round and his fist connected solidly with Rodney's face.

* * *

Rodney was irritated. Irritated that he too had been tricked by the alien device and irritated that John refused to say what the AI had made him hallucinate. It really was only fair John should say, after all Rodney had accidentally revealed that he'd seen Zelenka (which he was seriously never going to live down) and John had seen Woolsey's hallucination.

So he questioned and pushed the subject and needled John for a response. It really wasn't anything more then he'd done on any other given occasion.

Which is why he never saw the punch coming.

One moment he was walking and rambling to John, the next moment a burst of pain opened up just above his eyebrow and he staggered back, tripped and fell unceremoniously to the floor. Pain in his ass quickly joined the pain in his face.

"Ooph." Rodney sat there on the floor in a (luckily) empty corridor, completely and utterly stunned.

Had Sheppard just _hit_ him?

"You… hit me," said Rodney. Obviously. But he was lost on what else he was supposed to say. So maybe he should focus on the injuries, he'd just been hit, he was bound to have injuries. God, he hadn't just been hit, but he'd been hit in his head. A concussion, he probably had a concussion, and the resulting fall had certainly hurt his back.

He stared accusingly up at John, because had the man seriously just hit him?

Wide, shocked, hazel eyes stared back.

"Am I bleeding?" Rodney gingering touched his head and then looked at his hand. There was a few drops of blood on it. "I am bleeding! Oh, this is definitely a concussion, and stitches."

This seemed to jar John out of whatever stupor he'd been in.

"You okay?" asked John, dropping to his knees beside Rodney.

The quiet, worried tone should have been vaguely reassuring, but under the circumstances Rodney wasn't impressed. He was, after all, bleeding. And it was because of John, and Rodney still had no idea how to deal with that.

"Do I look okay?" Rodney snapped. "You hit me, I'm bleeding, I have a concussion and I need to get to the infirmary sooner rather than later."

This was beginning give him nasty flashbacks to a time when a certain lieutenant colonel had shot him. Except John hadn't been seeing him then. But the memory made Rodney snap his mouth shut. Reminding John over and over again hadn't helped then and it was unlikely to help now.

"I know, Rodney. I'm sorry," John was saying, still looking more than a little dazed himself. "You can stand, right?"

"Did you miss something I just said? I have a concussion because_ someone _just hit me and…" Rodney stopped talking. Hadn't he just resolved not to repeat that again? "I could walk."

John stood up and Rodney flinched away from the movement before realising the John was simply offering a hand up.

John looked worried. Rodney ignored that and took the offered hand before John could back off, allowing himself to be pulled to his feet. Then he turned his back on John and headed for the infirmary, the soft footsteps behind him indicated that John was following. That suited Rodney just fine. He was prepared to admit he could irritate people, after all people irritated him, but for John to hit him there had to be something seriously wrong and Rodney intended to get to the bottom of it.

* * *

Jennifer Keller was having a relatively quiet day in the infirmary. So she supposed she really should have expected something to happen, and it wasn't even particularly rare for that something to appear in the form of on Dr Rodney McKay.

However what she wasn't expecting was that he was accompanied by an alarmed and apologetic looking Colonel Sheppard. Or that McKay had an actual injury, small that it was.

"There you are!" said Rodney, swiftly changing direction and heading straight for her. He pointed to his head. "A concussion and I've no doubt I'll need stitches. And before you ask what happened, he hit me."

The accusing finger was pointed at Sheppard. Jennifer figured this to be an exaggeration. She had no doubt they'd done something like walked into each other.

Sheppard made a little helpless gesture. "I just….." He trailed off.

"You did hit him?" Jennifer was more than a little surprised. She'd noticed over her time in Atlantis that Sheppard and Rodney were good friends, something that had been particularly evident with Rodney's experience with the Second Childhood. As she had got closer to Rodney it had seemed that he and Sheppard were more like brothers. She supposed brothers did have fights, although getting into a fist fight was really not Rodney's style.

Sheppard made the same helpless gesture again, apparently lacking the words to explain.

Rodney however, rarely did things quietly. "Yes, he hit me and I have a concussion. Do I need stitches? A stay overnight, perhaps?"

So Rodney at least was behaving normally, so she could rule out after effects from the AI. Woolsey had informed her of those who'd been affected should any medical problem arise. Jennifer suspected Rodney was fine, but she checked anyway, if nothing else it would reassure him.

She smiled warmly at Rodney. "You're okay. No concussion and you won't even need stitches. I'll clean and cover it for you and then you're free to go."

Sheppard was visibly relieved.

"Oh." Rodney looked taken aback. "Are you sure? Maybe I should stay here a few hours for observation. You know, just in case?"

It was entirely unnecessary, but the infirmary was mostly empty and it wouldn't do any harm, so Jennifer agreed. And pretended not to notice when Sheppard slipped out of the infirmary as she cleaned the cut. Hopefully he and Rodney would discuss what had happened later, but she wasn't holding her breath, there were some things on which she'd swear she'd seen clams more talkative then Sheppard.

* * *

Rodney as settling into the infirmary bed when John returned, bearing blue Jell-O.

Rodney found himself in the unusual position of having no idea what to do, or not so unusual really. People skills weren't his strong point, science was. Pure science, numbers, formulas that didn't lie and, far more importantly, didn't turn around and attack you with no warning.

In Rodney's opinion offence was the best defence in most social situations, but in this case he was supposed to be finding out what was wrong with his friend, not aggravating him more and he still didn't have the slightest idea how to address it.

Even putting his people skills aside, how did you talk to your extremely private best friend about a clearly touchy subject when you have no idea what actually happened? Rodney had a feeling it was even harder when openly talking personal things was just not how your friendship operated.

John offered him the Jell-O, failing to look directly at him. "Figured you might want this."

Which begged the question of exactly where he'd found the Jell-O. The supplies never lasted very long and it was a while since they'd had a good supply of it, either on the Daedalus or the Apollo.

"Where did you get this? Does your military have a stash you've been hiding from me? Because I will find it." Rodney plucked the Jell-O from John's hand. "And where's the coffee?"

"Didn't you just have coffee?"

So maybe he had had some coffee before leaving the mess hall, that was not the point. Coffee worked almost as well as Jell-O as an apology in Rodney's books. Only he had bigger fish to fry then inquiring after Jell-O and coffee, and he could always hunt down the Jell-O stash later.

Digging into his prize, Rodney paused to jab the spoon in John's general direction. "And that is so off topic." Not that he'd brought up the topic yet. "I think I have the right to know exactly why you risked giving me a severe concussion and the fact that you bring me Jell-O from wherever you've been stashing it tells me you know it was undeserved. So out with it."

Rodney shovelled a heaped spoon of Jell-O into his mouth in an attempt to buy time so he could salvage the situation, since his skills at bringing up a sensitive topic weren't getting any better.

John winced. "Look, Rodney…."

"No, you're right, that wasn't exactly how I meant to say that." Which made no sense because John hadn't said anything to be right about, but Rodney ploughed on regardless. "But… but you'd be angry too if I'd just decided to-"

"It was Kolya."

"Oh." Rodney stopped babbling. Well didn't that just open up a whole new can of worms. One that they hadn't discussed since... actually they'd never really discussed it. Although it shouldn't have been a surprise, not really. After all, who just moves on and forgets about being repeatedly fed on by a wraith?

John seemed to take Rodney's silence as a request to continue. "At least, I _thought _it was Kolya, only it turned out to be that damned AI screwing with my head and I got back here and I just needed to… hit something." He rubbed the back of his neck with one hand. "I'm sorry."

"Well… erm… you know, what's a little punching between friends?" Rodney stared at his Jell-O. He'd started this and now… he supposed he should say something. Except… he wasn't sure he still wanted to know what John thought had happened on the mainland. "Just… tell me there was no wraith involved."

_That_ provoked a flinch. Definitely the wrong thing to say, now he'd properly dragged up bad memories.

"No! It was…" John sighed. "Basically what you'd expect. He wanted my IDC so he could take Atlantis. Or I thought he did."

Right. The whole hallucinating thing. And yet Rodney couldn't decide whether an AI Kolya was better than a real Kolya, all things (and wraith feedings) considered.

"I spent all that time thinking I was fighting Kolya and then I got back to the jumper and there were the two scientists waiting, annoyed that I'd taken so long to get there."

"Yes, well. You know what I think of Parrish, he's an astrobiologist, useless science really." Rodney had noticed that John kept flexing his left hand and then glancing down at it. It was grating at Rodney, he wouldn't mention it though. Of course he wouldn't. It was, after all, most likely linked to the Kolya hallucination.

"What's wrong with your hand?" The question burst out without his permission. Fantastic. If he kept this up it would almost be reasonable for John to flip out and deck him again.

"Nothing," John said, too quickly, then grimaced. "Another part of this whole mess. Nothing _is_ wrong with it. But I thought Kolya… took it."

"Took it?" asked Rodney, failing to understand what John meant by that.

"Yeah. Cut it off. Something about using the genetic material to fly the jumper. But I _felt_ it," Sheppard finished quietly, clenching his left hand into a fist.

"Oh, um.. well I don't think it's possible, because the mental component…" Rodney trailed off. "Anyway, like you said; your hand is fine and, I forgive you."

John just stared at him, so Rodney elaborated.

"For hitting me. But, I forgive you on the condition that you bring me coffee. Right away, to my lab."

John quirked an eyebrow. "Thought you were staying here for observation?"

"Yes, yes. I was, but I'm sure Jennifer's diagnosis was as perfectly sound as voodoo can be and I've got very important work to do that I'm now behind on thanks to Zelen- the AI. So I need to be in my lab and I need coffee."

It occurred to Rodney that maybe he should try and discuss the 'losing a hand' aspect of things further. Except John really didn't look like he wanted to and if he was honest, Rodney wasn't too wild on the idea either and it never had been the way they did things. No doubt it would now fall into the never-mention-under-any-circumstances category along with iratus bugs, the first spectacular fail with the retrovirus, the wraith hallucination device and Kolya in general.

"And you can get me some more Jell-O from that secret stash of yours," Rodney announced.

"Don't push it." John gave him a false stern look and turned to leave the infirmary.

"Don't forget the coffee!" Rodney called anxiously after him.

"Yeah, yeah." John waved a dismissive hand back in Rodney's direction, before disappearing around the corner.

"I guess… that went better then it could have," Rodney muttered to himself. That said, the idea of his friend being beaten up by Kolya again was bound to give him nightmares. However, for the moment there was hot coffee due in his lab, so he got up from the infirmary bed and set off to see what damage his scientists had managed to do in his absence.

* * *

**A/N:** I'd just like to say that this was more difficult to write then I'd been expecting, trying to keep track of exactly what each person saw and heard in the episode. I think I sorted it all out, but if you noticed anything, please let me know .


End file.
